Why We Should All Vote Mike Sonko

You all know I had promised to ‘let Sonko be’ for the sake of his friendly supporters. Well, I’ve decided to do more; stand in solidarity with #TeamSonko. I see nothing wrong with echoing their wonderful reasons why Mike Mbuvi MUST be the Nairobi governor. Before that, let here what Sonko haters (as his opponents are called) say about him.

The Sonko they know

To ‘haters’, Sonko is a heap of staggering incompetence; a man with everything but oversight and managerial skills. That Mike Sonko’s time as Makadara MP and now as the Nairobi Senator has shown a man unequal to task…with the least idea what his job description is. That Gideon had to resort to selective generosity (helping a few poor people in full glare of TV to appease the rest). That the Senator, to stay afloat, became a pro-hawker and anti-land-grabbing activist. And, of course, embracing the lowest forms of sycophancy to Uhuru..all in a desperate attempt to hid his conspicuous incompetence.

The men and women opposed to Sonko’s gubernatorial bid say that he is rumored to be ‘pharmacists’. That Joho…Oops! I mean Sonko is functionally illiterate, full of infantile hubris and use politics to hide and obfuscate his nefarious activities…I tell you, the haters have some of the most non-endearing words for our glorious Senator and the incoming governor….

But who cares about the truth? This is Kenya and the truth is never in the facts but in the telling. Let’s introduce you the Sonko we know. The one we MUST all vote.

The Sonko We Know

Our Sonko is a super rich poor man. A man who adorns gold, can have lunch in Dubai, drives the best of cars and lives in palatial homes yet with ample time to lie on roads, box fences, adopt orphans and lead pro-poor demos just to list a few. Mike Mbuvi Sonko, simply put, has left his comfort zone to literally fight for the poor and share his wealth with them.

More than several times, Nairobi’s ONLY hope has been seen carrying scary bundles of notes to support ailing women, buy goats for ‘watu wa eastlando’, fund weddings among other high-impact development projects. Ati how did he acquire his wealth? C’mon guys that’s being petty. All we know is that he was once poor but now a rich philanthropist and that should suffice. Just know that he rose from ‘grass to grace’ Sawa?

Our Sonko, unlike uthamaki’s Peter Kenneth for instance, has always stood with the president. When decorum prevented everyone, who insulted ICC on our behalf..wore branded T-shirt and led demos at the Hague? Who went declared himself the acting president when basic decency prohibited it? Who has called our president (on speaker) to undermine a CS directive…just to defend the common man? The answer is Mike Gideon Mbuvi Sonko..Nairobi’s ONLY Hope.

Governor Sonko

Mike Mbuvi will be a ‘mtu wa watu’ kinda governor. Exactly what Nairobi is dying for. Unlike the elitists, Sonko promised to turn Uhuru Park into a Matatu Stage. Sonko, being the generous man he is, is likely to set up Handout Department at City Hall, where we (the poor) will pick our daily keeps. And unlike Kidero or PK who are obviously anti-hawkers, our man Sonko understands the plight of hawkers. So, don’t be surprised to see us deep inside City Hall, Harambee House, and other high-value targets ‘tukitafuta unga’.

I ask you to join us in ensuring Sonko wins the Jubilee Ticket and eventually the flooring Kidero. Thanks in advance.

NOTE: This is not satire.